Still No Baby and a Change of Names

Only 3 more days until my due date and still no baby. The anticipation is nearly killing me! I was sure I'd have him early after having heard that he dropped and I have been dilated to a two for the past 3 weeks, but still nothing. No contractions, no cramping; nada. I keep thinking I'm going to wake up in the middle of the night with contractions or my water broken, but now I'm starting to doubt this. I think our sweet little boy is hanging on for the big grand entrance, maybe the 4th of July??

So since the last time I had posted, Dan and I have finally settled our name debate and have decided on a name that both of us adore. We are going to name the baby Maddox or call him Maddox, however his full name will be James Maddox Barrie. I think it's a strong name and Dan and I are both happy with it. We were going to go with Maddox James, since we intend to call him Maddox, but neither of us feel it sounds as strong. I still adore the name Harper Donovan, but I wanted to be fair in what we name our first baby, since it the first baby for both of us. Having given up Harper also gives me full reign of the name for the second baby, but a second baby is still years away for us. :)

I see the doctor tomorrow and hopefully I'll have more of an update then. Until then, we wait for our precious baby boy!

It's the Waiting Game

Only 18 days until my due date! However, I have this feeling that the baby is coming this week or possibly weekend. The baby has dropped as low as he possibly can, without actually being born. I am dilated to a two (which I laugh about saying or posting on here because I feel like talking about how dilated I am is one of those things you don't say as it involves your private parts, LOL!!). Of course that's assuming that anyone even reads this blog. Our midwife also tells us the cervix has thinned out 75%, again one of those things that just seems like TMI (too much information)n. Anyhow, all this leads up to the fact that the arrival of my baby boy is getting close. I have had a few false contractions, referred to as Braxton Hicks, which is supposedly preparing my body for the real thing. I don't see how false contractions are going to prepare me for the most excruciating pain of my life, but okay, that's what the midwife tells me. I'm getting nervous about the labor and delivery, but excited about finally meeting our little boy. I've waited 9 1/2 long months for this day and in reality I've waited many years for this day, which I started to believe would never happen, until of course I met my sweet husband, Dan.

Of course, I am faced with a dilemma, which is a name for a sweet baby boy. I thought we had agreed on Harper Donovan, but about two weeks ago Dan tells me he doesn't like Harper now. How can he tell me this 9 months into the pregnancy and after at least 8 month of referring to my baby bump as Harper? SO NOT RIGHT! We have agreed that I get the first name of our first born and he gets the middle name, so he has also said I can still name him Harper if I chose to, but wanted me to know how he felt about it. I feel like the baby is already Harper, so I'm not sure I want to change it, however I also hate to think that my husband doesn't care for it. I did ask for guidance in a prayer though one night regarding the name and woke up with the name Maddox, which I also like and Dan likes as well (and no I had no idea it was Angelina Jolie's son's name before hand, I guess I don't follow the tabloids). I'm just not sure it feels right yet. It's a Welsh name and means good and generous, which is certainly a positive. I am just hoping that when I hold the baby for the first time I'll know what to name him and it'll just feel right. I don't want to be that couple that leaves the hospital without a baby name, but anything is possible.

Also, I'd like to point out I've learned a very valuable lesson here with the baby's name. Never tell your families what you think you are going to name the baby before the baby arrives. Keep that between you and your husband, because really the decision is up to the parents, not our families (yeah dad's I'm blasting your asses on here, haha!). I just can't believe all the grief I have gotten from both of the fathers and the truth is I would of expected it more from the mothers, but I guess they've been through this already so they can relate and have been great about it. If and when we have another baby, the fathers will not be privy to the name before hand, cause I don't want to hear it! And my brother in law also made a very good point......it's the child that makes the name, not the name that makes the child.

Just a Little Tadpole

I am new to this and not sure how this will visually look, so I'm doing a little test run so I can play with the settings on my page.

So I found out I was pregnant a few days before Thanksgiving of 2009. I remember it was a Thursday and I told my husband, Dan, that I thought I was pregnant,because I had been feeling so sick for a few days. We had discussed pregnancy before and had agreed if I was we would be totally ready for it. We both felt we were at an age when it was either going to happen or not, so we were prepared to embrace it (don't let this fool you, we weren't prepared for a lot of other stuff soon to follow). Well he went to bed that Thursday night and although I told him I was going to take the test in the morning, I couldn't wait.....I had to know!! I figured I had two tests, as I bought a two pack, so I could do one that night and one the following morning. As soon as I pee'd on that little stick I got a plus sign and was in total shock. For some reason, I was convinced it wasn't going to be easy for me to get pregnant. Boy was I ever wrong, a month off the pills and BAM!

I didn't know whether to be happy or to cry, because my life was about to totally change. I picked up the phone and called the constant in my life, my mother. By the time she picked up I was crying and not sure exactly what to say. So I just blurted it out, "I'm Pregnant and you're going to be a Grandma." I wasn't sure what kind of response I was going to get. She was thrilled, which is a good thing, because it helped stop the tears. I cried because I wasn't sure Dan and I were financially ready and I wasn't sure and sometimes still question, whether we'll be good parents. I tried to remind myself of what my grandmother always said, "If you wait until you can afford children, you are never going to have them."

So here we are 8 months into this pregnancy now. The first trimester was a complete nightmare for me. I was sick all the time and so tired. I came down with the stomach flu and a week later got strep throat. I was convinced I was a walking magnet for germs at this point and was using hand sanitizer like I owned stock in it. The only good thing that came out of the first trimester is that my boobs were getting HUGE! Of course, I was also getting the gut to go with the boobs (to hold up the boobs). Go figure!!

The second trimester seems like it was a breeze and it wasn't until the first week in the second trimester that I got my first ultrasound since week 6 and got to see the baby. I cried during this ultra sound and felt so relieved to hear the heartbeat for the first time. I had been so sick early on, was worried it was going to hurt the baby, but as the nurses told me, "Babies are more resilient than you would think." It was also during the second trimester that we found out we are having a BOY! My husband was so relieved to find out we were having a boy and said, "Oh God I am so relieved, I don't know what I would of done with a girl."

I am now in the third trimester and obviously SO pregnant. I've gained something like 20 pounds so far and my belly is definitely protruding. I've long said good-bye to all my normal non-pregnancy clothes and hello to all the pants with elastic bands that hug your belly. I'll admit those pants with elastic bands are pretty darn comfortable. I wonder why overweight women don't take to wearing them? They just don't know what they are missing!

I had my first pregnancy scare this past week, April 29th. I have been keeping a fetal kick count of the baby and he's been quite the mover and shaker the past three weeks. It wasn't until late this past week that he started slowing down quite a bit. I wasn't even feeling 10 kicks in 2 hours and the doctor had told me that might be reason to be alarmed. Well I was!! I woke up on Thursday morning and felt him kick and then nothing for 3 hours. I called the Advice Hotline for pregnant women through my insurance company and they thought I ought to come in to be monitored. I went in and was admitted to labor and delivery and was given a room and hooked up to all these strange monitors. The minute I heard the little guys heart beat I started to cry. I was again relieved. They monitored his heart and movements for the next 3 hours and our baby was just fine. The type of movements he was making were changing, so we believe it may have just been that I didn't know what to be feeling for. I was lucky enough to get another ultra sound and I saw the baby. He's so big now and you can't even see him all in one screen shot. I saw his heart pumping and the little valves in it, his hands, his rib cage, and eyes. He even grabbed his foot for me with his hand. He is the most beautiful creature I've ever seen.

The bottom line is I'm a new soon to be mother who is paranoid because this is all entirely new to me. I have not done this before. I have been told that it's better to be a little over cautious than not at all. I just hope this some indicator that I'll be a good mother to my son Harper.